1. |
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I grew up in Los Angeles
My mother kept me from the colored kids
There’re some things that just don’t mix
So we moved out of Los Angeles
And drove to Paradise
Mountains wild like upside down jaws
Teeth trying to stab the sky
A Californian Riviera
White girls showing plenty of skin
This is Paradise
The house flooded from the farmers’ mistakes
And the carpet smells like rotten milk
Kathleen’s dancing like an idiot
And all the neighbors moved away
It was Paradise
Kathleen moved to Los Angeles
She needed money for the colored x
Mother died in ’86
While Kathleen was dancing for cash
At Paradise
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2. |
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The cousins are coming home
Emma hopes she won’t be left alone
With Lucas the 19 year old
Who studies math at the University of Chicago
At the table
Kathleen whispers in Emma’s ear
Your jeans are too tight and your blouse is too sheer
Mother do you think I care
For any word your folded voice slips in my ear
At the table
Garlic skin cleaves to stainless steel
Bread’s baking for the nephews’ favorite meal
Emma bites her anxious tongue
Everything tastes more and more like copper blood
At the table
Why on earth do we live in this barren god-forsaken desert town
All that I can say my dear is my heart has drawn me home
Los Angeles would take us back, I know, mother can’t we go on home
Like a swallow builds a nest I have gathered stones here
The sun is my absent abusive Father beating on my brow all day
The sun has woke you every morning with a warm kiss on your face
The Salton Sea it is my mother and all around is the stench of death
The Sea is home to birds in winter, the crane has nowhere else to go
This place is terrible
I can go nowhere
This place is beautiful
I can go nowhere
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3. |
Imperial Valley
02:52
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Imperial Valley, oh won’t you take me home
I’m so sick of this city I gotta get out of Chicago
I keep asking the question, where’d the sunshine go
I keep asking the question, where’d my sunshine go
I wanna know
Imperial Valley, oh please don’t change a thing
Turtledove and swallow, and the long legged Crane
Can they all live together, or am I insane
I keep asking the question, brother, am I insane
She has my name
I need the sun
I need the sea
I need to believe
That she needs me
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4. |
And the Crane
04:27
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We arrived on the weekend, it was a 30 hour drive
From Chicago to Niland, our hometown of such a small size
Aunt Kathleen was cooking our favorite meal
I could see through your shirt, if only you could see how I feel
Oh the sweat it drips down my face
The table fell over and the wine stained your blouse
I heard you turn on the shower so I walked up the stairs in your house
The bedroom door was open, and so I sat on your bed
I heard you turn off the shower and my cheeks were turning red
And the sweat it drips off my face
Don’t you know I love you so, Emmeline
Come with me to Chicago
All the while our hearts will grow
We’ll fly away like two swallows, Emmeline
Your blankets were flannel in the winter that year
Your room smelt like lavender, so different than the Salton Sea air
The girls in the city, well they just ain’t the same
I’d risk it all for you, I’d change my DNA
The water must have been dripping everywhere
I had my eye on the doorknob, like the scope of a gun
I had my mind of your eyelashes, cut through the California sun
As the door opened, wrapped in your white towel
I patted the bed next to me and we sat there for quite a while
As the water dripped from your hair
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5. |
Fishbone Sand
04:05
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She was kissed by her cousin on her very own bed
She didn’t know what was softer, her flannel sheets or his hand
She was pissed at her mother for making her stay
So she ran away
She went out walking on Highway 111
I was afraid he’d see my face
I was afraid I’d see his face
But I don’t know where I’m supposed to go but home
After he fell asleep she rolled off the bed
Put on a lightweight dress and a winter hat on her head
Toes dug down deep in the fishbone sand
Throwing stones in the sea she discovered a plan
She’d go hitchhiking on Highway 111
Get in the car darling
We drive real far darling
Get the hell out of town
There’s no one else around
I was afraid He’d see my face
I was afraid I’d see His face
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6. |
Greasewood
03:53
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I was afraid he’d see my face
And the the blood on my lips
From the terror of grace
I bit my bitter tongue
And spit out copper blood
In the night, on the side of the road
I was walking somewhere
That I didn’t know
The car pulled up so quick
I was scared of him
But I’m alright
I’ll be just fine
The desert gets
So cold at night
I declined the ride from that man
Did I make mistake
There’s goosebumps on my hands
When the California sun
Hides from everyone
I was afraid I’d see his face
But my tired brown eyes
Can’t see a thing in this place
The greasewood bush caught flame
I slept there all the same
I’m not alright
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7. |
Aubergine
04:00
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Hazel eyes and a crooked smile
A little girl just for a little while
Polished toes in french lilac
In ginger sand against the asphalt black
She’s only seventeen
Sweet like a tangerine
Emmeline, in a dress colored aubergine
Golden hair and milk-white skin
She always knows the styles before they’re in
Rosewood lips and callous hands
Silly child is always making Palm Spring plans
I moved away from the city lights
Two hundred miles to leave the seedy nights
Like my mother before me, I danced and danced and danced
And when my belly grew, I took my only chance to follow the Light
The blinding Light will guide you home
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8. |
Sonoran Sun
02:40
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The Sonoran Sun is the only one who follows me
I just wanted to be found by you, don’t you see
In a ditch by the bush, drowned in sunlight and screams
The sand-hill crane flew away startled by the horn of Kathleen
Awoken with the bird, Emma embraced everything
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9. |
Salt of the Earth
05:39
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In the darkness of the desert
He was walking in the sand
Searching for Emmeline
Following footprints near the pier
In Niland on the shore he throws
Stones into the Salton Sea
I’m sorry
For everything I’ve done
My apologies
Will never be enough
Untying the knot that holds the boat
At bay he remembers that night
She went swimming in the sea
The splintered wood of the oar
Engraves his flesh and pierces his palms
Yet he rows further into the deep
I’ll find you
And surely you will see
How sweet the fruit
Tastes from the family tree
The boat floor
Is splitting like a branch
The wood’s old
I never had the chance
When they found him on the shore
The turtledove and swallow were
Nesting in his dark brown hair without a care
They took his body for her to see
And in the backyard they dug deep
The turtledove returned to stay there on his grave
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10. |
Father's Day
04:17
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For my son on Father’s Day
There was a bird atop your grave
A turtledove brushed up against the crane
Kathleen grabbed my shirt that day
She tore my collar trying to say
Close your eyes, brother look away
On the goldenrod near the indigo
On the goldenrod near the indigo, he went home
I called the pastor here in town
In the sea my son did drown
Did his death pay for anything
My sister prayed for forty days
Prayer can’t reimburse the grave
He is gone, your daughter dances on
I’m not sure that I believe in anything anymore
Everything’s dying, everyone’s leaving me behind
I’m not sure that I believe in anything anymore but You
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The Selfish Giant Brooklyn, New York
The Selfish Giant - the songs of Matthew Tinken with the help of Bernard Chadwick, Scott Cowan, Christopher Morrison, Peter Mandrillo, Carlen Walth, Austin Drake, Rachel Chadwick and Lauren Meares.
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